


Shards of You

by sooyah (colourmeblack)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Or not, broken!kaisoo, but why, junmyeon/kyungsoo is sudo right, slight!sudo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-06
Updated: 2016-02-06
Packaged: 2018-05-18 13:45:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5930593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colourmeblack/pseuds/sooyah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The hazelnut cappuccino tasted bitter on his tongue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shards of You

_you've read the books, you've watched the show,_  
_what's the best way? no one knows._

 

When they stopped seeing each other, Jongin thought he'll be alright, that he can stand by himself without Kyungsoo watching him from his side, without the person who silently supports the younger boy like a column prevailing the roof from crumbling down.

When Kyungsoo said he's got enough, Jongin didn't say anything. He stayed silent as Kyungsoo rambled about the fact that Jongin's the one who finally, finally lost the spark first, that Kyungsoo wasn't bright enough to ignite him up like he had always does and how this won't work, how their relationship would end up being as hollow as the cardboard boxes scattered around their flat when Kyungsoo packed his things up before moving out of the-now Jongin's-flat.

No matter how much Kyungsoo stripped the rooms bare of his traces as if he never existed in Jongin's life, the small man is still tucked safely in a corner of the younger man's heart. Though tattered and fragile, Jongin still treasured the little Kyungsoo box in his mind, hoping that someday he'll have enough courage to try and win Kyungsoo back.

(Or so he hoped.)

 

Jongin kept his mouth shut and forced a small smile when he accidentally meets Kyungsoo again on the sixth month after their breakup.

He was ordering his usual cup of hazelnut cappuccino in the cafe he frequented before, with, and after Kyungsoo. A familiar voice chuckled from behind him and Jongin reflexively turned his head. It was just  _that_ unmistakable.

"Hey," Kyungsoo greeted, smile warm, "are you done with your hazelnut cappuccino or are you going to hold the line for five more minutes?"

For a moment, it felt like the world had righted itself.

Kyungsoo standing behind him in his puffy coat and snarky remark felt strangely familiar-Jongin recognized the scarf he wore as the one he impulsively bought for Kyungsoo on one of their winter dates when it was so cold outside and Kyungsoo, being the (stupid and) stubborn bastard he was, ignored the forecast of heavy snow. Jongin could picture it as if it was yesterday-the day (it was Saturday), Kyungsoo's clothes (an ugly christmas sweater with a t-shirt underneath, black denims, beat-up sneakers, clearly not winter-friendly), the small walk they had before Kyungsoo got too cold, a detour to some random store in an emergency hunt for woolen scarves, the warm cup of chocolate Jongin nursed with his cold hands, the steams curling atop Kyungsoo's espresso, the lights in his eyes when he's watching falling snows outside.

The nostalgia hit him hard he almost choke on nothing.

"I'm-I'm sorry, and a slice of opera, yes, dine-in, please," he said the last part to the barista behind the counter. He chanced a glance behind while waiting for the barista to ring up his order and noticed another man standing beside Kyungsoo, seemingly confused at the weird exchange they just had.

Jongin gave a small nod to Kyungsoo and his companion, just to be polite, before scurrying off to a small table nearby. He  _totally_ didn't do that to spy on Kyungsoo, he just needed to know whether Kyungsoo still takes his coffee-

"Double espresso, two shots of sugar."

Like that. Of course.

He let out a small, almost inaudible groan, hands ruffling his own hair. It felt so surreal and Jongin could imagine the next scene; Kyungsoo walking to sit in front of him, starting a game of footsies, or just watching the surrounding in silence. Jongin would play with Kyungsoo's fingers and the older man would giggle when Jongin tickled him too much, cheeks rosy from his laughter and the harsh weather. Working on their own assignments. Jongin occasionally doodling random things in Kyungsoo's notes. Kyungsoo retaliating by biting his pen in midair.

Jongin looked up, disappointed as his reverie was broken when another voice joined Kyungsoo's-the other man ordered a piece of blueberry muffin with his chamomile tea and Jongin almost snorted. How could someone order a cup of tea at seven a.m., while everyone is busy drowning themselves in caffeinated coffees? Who in their right mind would do that? Obviously not him.

Obviously not a broody, sleep-laden guy with bored face looking like he's about to die before his eight a.m. class start.

The man was short, maybe a little bit taller than Kyungsoo, but well-built. His facial expression exudes warmth and it seemed like he had a bright smile permanently fixed on his face-an exact opposite of Jongin who rarely smiles unless somebody named Kyungsoo is involved. Eyes which lingered too long on Kyungsoo, and is that affection in his stare?

Suddenly Jongin felt nauseous.

Only then did he realize that Kyungsoo had his mitten-covered hand held by the man.

 

The pair decided to have their orders to-go. Jongin _obviously_ didn't mean to eavesdrop. He also willed himself hard not to steal another glance at Kyungsoo but failing pathetically, only to caught his eye and grabbed his attention. Jongin coughed, loudly, averting his stare and cursing whoever deity responsible for making his life miserable.

(Or maybe it's just himself.)

Someone called his name from the counter.

Kyungsoo and the other man has yet to get their orders done.

What a good timing.

Taking a deep breath, Jongin walked slowly to the counter, ignoring the painful sensation in his gut.  _Take the tray and walk away, Jongin_ , _take the tray and walk away._

"Hi, Jongin."

How easily crumbled his willpower is. He forced the corners of his lips upward, "Um. Hello, Kyungsoo. And..."

"Oh! This is Junmyeon. Junmyeon, Jongin. He's a friend I met on a class in the first year-"

Jongin could feel his smile slipping away. "Uh, yeah, nice to meet you, Junmyeon."

The man-Junmyeon smiled wider. Jongin didn't think it's possible. "Nice to meet you too, Jongin." he greets, cheerful, then turned to Kyungsoo, "I'm going to fetch our orders, okay? You stay here and have a chat to catch up with Jongin or something."

Kyungsoo sent him away with a  _sure, thanks Junmyeon_ , before facing Jongin again. "So, hazelnut cappuccino, huh?"

"I just can't bring myself to try other drinks, other than this and hot chocolate," Jongin muttered, not quite meeting Kyungsoo's eyes. He's afraid he would start to break down if he so much looked at the deep brown orbs of the man before him. He played with the napkin to ease his fidgeting, a habit he had when he's nervous or uneasy. Now that he had said it, it could also mean that he couldn't get Kyungsoo out of his heart and try to date someone else. Maybe it's just him overthinking. Maybe Kyungsoo wouldn't think that way.

Kyungsoo's laughter was rich and clear. Jongin had almost forgotten how the tinkling sound sounds, having not heard it for months. He scowled, "Like you're one to talk! You always have those boring espressos every time!"

"It's because I need the caffeine, Jongin. I have tried another kind of drinks, too." Kyungsoo said between peals of laughter. "Although I can't deny that espressos are my favorite-"

"Soo, I have our drinks!" Kyungsoo's words was cut when Junmyeon wrapped his fingers around Kyungsoo's wrist, his other hand carrying a takeaway container and a small box for his muffin. Jongin could see the steam wafting out of the lids and felt the wave of queasiness coming right back.

Two steaming cups. A hand curled around his wrist. Exchanged smiles.

But not his to have.

 

The pair bids goodbye, walked out of the cafe hand-in-hand, and Jongin was back on his seat. He wondered if Kyungsoo felt as awkward as him on the accidental run-in, but he's almost sure it's negative because there was no sign of troubled feeling on Kyungsoo's face.

Do Kyungsoo's face was the definite description of happiness--he's bright, almost literally, brilliant and vivid and Jongin had never seen him in such blissful state. He didn't know whether it's the other boy's smile which brought back the light Kyungsoo had almost lost or it's simply because he's happy he doesn’t have to look after this whiny and gloomy boy he used to call love.

Jongin hates both probabilities.

 

The hazelnut cappuccino tasted bitter on his tongue.

**Author's Note:**

> ...another repost from my livejournal. this writing was pretty much inspired by The Script's Six Degrees of Separation.


End file.
